Ever wish you could be more assertive at work? According to psychotherapist Julia Johnson, you can become more assertive with practice (and you will need to practice!) if you know your eight basic ‘rights’:
1 The Right: To be yourself. As long as you are not deliberately hurting someone, or acting unlawfully, you don’t have to change your beliefs or behaviours to satisfy others.
2 The Right: To be respected. It’s ok to be different and think differently from others. You have a right to express your views, and to have your feelings, needs and opinions respected by others.
3 The Right: To say ‘no’. If you are unable to comply with someone’s request, don’t be afraid to say ‘No’ in a clear and polite way. If saying 'No’ is difficult due to your contract of employment, you have the right to discuss with your line manager any difficulty your work is causing - especially if you are being over-loaded with tasks.
4 The Right: To ask for what you need or want. Be straightforward and polite when asking for more resources or even a salary rise. Don’t expect people to guess – working by telepathy is like driving by telepathy - if you don’t indicate where you are going and what you want, you’ll soon crash.
5 The Right: To not understand or to know about something. You can’t be expected to know or understand everything – so it’s ok to ask. And if you still don’t understand, ask again - in all likelihood, it wasn’t being explained particularly well!
6 The Right: To make a mistake. Humans make mistakes – it’s one of the main ways we learn. If you’re not making any mistakes, you’re not striving to achieve your full potential!
7 The Right: To change your mind. Circumstances change or you may get new information which means you have to re-evaluate previous decisions. Sometimes changing your mind means upsetting someone else. Allow them their feelings - but ensure the right to change your mind does not become an excuse for being unreliable.
8 The Right: To be successful. It’s ok to feel good about your successes. If someone pays you a compliment, don’t play it down. Accept it and say ‘Thank you!’
You also have the right to choose not to be assertive. ‘Choice’ is the operative word. And as we all have rights, the rights above will also apply to others.